you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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