so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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