dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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