The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
