P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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