The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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