I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
NoShamevember. You game?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize