I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
