we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
