If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
