Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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