just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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