omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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