Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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