i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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