I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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