I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
