that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
