living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
