she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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