Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
