is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize