If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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