Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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