I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
where are you?
Hypothermia
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
