So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
