Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
