so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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