i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize