do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I need to calm my uterus...
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
