I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I cannot find my penis.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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