Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks