I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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