did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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