Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
