She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
