butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
