I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize