words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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