i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
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