After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
