I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
