Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
