Umm I'm too high to move.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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