hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize