omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
My feet surprised me
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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