Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
