Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
