you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
