I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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