How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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