Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
